The keyboard's getting blurry. I guess these are all the tears and the guilt I've been holding back as long as possible. I still love nick_bomar. There's no real hiding it anymore, and its something I'm halfway trying to move on from before I end up screwing with the relationship I have that has made me so happy since January, 1st.
I'm not saying that I don't want to be with Marshall, I do. My world revolves around him and every day I wake up thinking of him and go to sleep with him as my last thoughts. I'm looking at a picture of him right now, and it hurts so much just to think that by letting this go I might be losing him. It might be the last night I get to call him mine, so I better enjoy it.
Marshall, I love you more than life itself. I don't want to lose you because of attachments to other people..
But.. I understand that with this post I'm handing you whats left of my heart and asking you to forgive me. If you don't want to be with me anymore, I understand that too.. I just don't want to lose you, and I want to be with you forever.. please forgive me.